Mercedes 230's, the Tri-Border Region, and the Rise of the Van Age...
Aden, I must take issue with your designation of the 230 series as the soup du jour of terrorist automobiles. Rather, if you'll take a gander at this model you'll agree that it is actually the Mercedes 200 series that epitomizes the terrorist abduction/C4-stuffed movable explosive car popularized in the Middle East in the 1970's. The 230, if you'll notice is actually a coupe, and would thusly not be conducive to kidnapping, say, the the children of Anwar al-Sadat, but rather, a singular, important figure, like King Hussein of Jordan.
Which brings me to my second point...Mercedes really are the flagship for European and Middle Eastern dignitaries and terrorists alike (who can tell the difference anymore, really). But other continents don't rely as heavily on Mercedes and instead go for more local forms of transport.
South America: I'm no geopolitical scientist, but I'll briefly break this down into three major regions of terrorism within South America: the Tri-border region of Brazil, Argentina and Paraguay, Colombia, and Peru. In the tri-border region, we have all the usual cronies of Al-Qaeda and Hamas working, so it would reason that, because of the ties to the Middle East, as well as the availability of a multitude of Mercedes models (with Brazil having several major Mercedes production plants), that this region would also favor the use of the Mercedes, just because its tried and true and they know how to wire/handle it. As for Colombia, I'm gonna go ahead and say that I have no idea what the terrorist car choice would be, as I've had trouble finding out the make and model of a FARC car bomb that went off in 2003, killing 32 people when it leveled an 11-story parking garage. And as for Shining Path and Peru, they're communists, so its probably some sort of Skoda or other Russian junker, or perhaps a Yugo?
I'm assuming Africans use some sort of Land Rover or Land Cruiser or other Lorrie to abduct people, as the roads there are treacherous and prone to being washed out during the heavy rains. I mean seriously, what kind of car do you think an Angolan mercenary drives? I bet it sure as hell ain't a Mercedes - those are normally reserved for African Dictators like Laurent Kabila, Paul Kagame, Edi Amin, hell, I bet Mugabe drives one of those Mercedes 500's as well...
And man, who knows how people get abducted in Asia, but I'll say this, in the Straits of Malacca, you're more prone to being abducted by Filipino pirates on a heroin-running ship than you are by a Mercedes...
And to my final point. Here in North America, where we do terrorism right, our standard vehicle for shady activities is and always will be an unmarked, windowless van. I don't care if it's a new van or an old Chevy junker, vans are by far the most versatile tool of terrorist threats in this country. McVeigh loaded his van up with pounds upon pounds of fertilizer, popular Latina singer Selena was abducted in a van, and shit, even Trent Steele was taken in a van. I put it to you, Company, to put the Van in its place among the annals of terrorist vehicles!
From a dude who loves Vans (and African dictators),
Null
Which brings me to my second point...Mercedes really are the flagship for European and Middle Eastern dignitaries and terrorists alike (who can tell the difference anymore, really). But other continents don't rely as heavily on Mercedes and instead go for more local forms of transport.
South America: I'm no geopolitical scientist, but I'll briefly break this down into three major regions of terrorism within South America: the Tri-border region of Brazil, Argentina and Paraguay, Colombia, and Peru. In the tri-border region, we have all the usual cronies of Al-Qaeda and Hamas working, so it would reason that, because of the ties to the Middle East, as well as the availability of a multitude of Mercedes models (with Brazil having several major Mercedes production plants), that this region would also favor the use of the Mercedes, just because its tried and true and they know how to wire/handle it. As for Colombia, I'm gonna go ahead and say that I have no idea what the terrorist car choice would be, as I've had trouble finding out the make and model of a FARC car bomb that went off in 2003, killing 32 people when it leveled an 11-story parking garage. And as for Shining Path and Peru, they're communists, so its probably some sort of Skoda or other Russian junker, or perhaps a Yugo?
I'm assuming Africans use some sort of Land Rover or Land Cruiser or other Lorrie to abduct people, as the roads there are treacherous and prone to being washed out during the heavy rains. I mean seriously, what kind of car do you think an Angolan mercenary drives? I bet it sure as hell ain't a Mercedes - those are normally reserved for African Dictators like Laurent Kabila, Paul Kagame, Edi Amin, hell, I bet Mugabe drives one of those Mercedes 500's as well...
And man, who knows how people get abducted in Asia, but I'll say this, in the Straits of Malacca, you're more prone to being abducted by Filipino pirates on a heroin-running ship than you are by a Mercedes...
And to my final point. Here in North America, where we do terrorism right, our standard vehicle for shady activities is and always will be an unmarked, windowless van. I don't care if it's a new van or an old Chevy junker, vans are by far the most versatile tool of terrorist threats in this country. McVeigh loaded his van up with pounds upon pounds of fertilizer, popular Latina singer Selena was abducted in a van, and shit, even Trent Steele was taken in a van. I put it to you, Company, to put the Van in its place among the annals of terrorist vehicles!
From a dude who loves Vans (and African dictators),
Null
posted by Aden at 7:18 AM
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